Watch how this guy reacts to a girl wearing a Hijab verses a girl not wearing a Hijab.
"so you can sit back down"
Always see “real women” posts so here’s one for the dudes.
this says so much. I wish there were more posts like this. please.
body positivity and realistic body standards are important for guys too!
Men are constantly reassured that it’s okay to oogle women and harrass them about their looks. Women rarely see sexualized images of men that are made for women.
Guys get eye candy everywhere they go. Their sexual gaze is constantly catered to. Women* are rarely given the opportunity to have their sexual interest entertained. We’re told that we should be okay with having nothing to look at. That our fantasies don’t matter. That we shouldn’t ever even remotely expect to be able to eyeball a svelte man in public, only behind closed doors and heaven forbid that the man look vulnerable. So we finally get to see images that turn us on and people are like, “Hey, you can’t put that in magazines! that might hurt some little boy’s feelings!”
Men are given alternative physical images to aspire to. Women are not.
While yes, guys should be treated to body positivity too… they already are. Just watch TV or any comedy and count the number of pudgy, out of shape, male leads vs pudgy, out of shape female leads. Or the number of hairy, overweight, older men making block buster movies vs the number of hairy, overweight, older women. Now count how many times that male character has some incredibly smart, sexy wife who does everything for him. And then how many times she’s the butt of the joke when he gets hot for some woman who’s younger and thinner than she is.
Fuck, just look at the responses to women not shaving their legs vs the responses to guys not shaving off their stubble.
Name six movies about a woman above the age of forty who’s love interest is a man that’s younger than she is where the plot doesn’t revolve around her being the butt of a cougar or mom joke. Now name me six where a man over the age of forty’s love interest is a woman who’s significantly younger than he is. Bonus points for action movies where anyone in the movie makes a mention of the age difference.
How many times are male politician or CEO’s body or style of dress put into question? How many times are female’s? Or has everyone forgotten how we flip out when the president’s wife gets a new hair cut? Or how Hillary Clinton had to have a FUCKING MAKE OVER before the news agencies took her seriously? How many times was her daughter raked over the coals for looking like an average teenager?
What’s more, I’ve never heard any of my female friends or my mother and her female friends saying, “Why can’t my 50 year old husband get a six pack like that?” What I USUALLY here is “I wish my husband would get a nice hair cut.” or “I wish he’d wear some nicer clothes that actually fit him.”
But what i hear overhear men saying all time is, “No fat chicks!” or “I wish my wife had bigger boobs.”
I know a woman who’s husband threatened to leave her if she didn’t get a face lift and a boob job- she was so upset that she did it. She felt disgusting every day because she wasn’t a size six and he expected her to be a size six after bearing him four kids. My own uncle said if his wife got overweight that he’d drag her behind a car until she lost weight. These aren’t even “bad guys”! They seem like perfectly nice men when you meet them! But they’re taught from the moment they’re kids that all women need to be a certain body type to be worthy of any attention.
Men are told through our culture’s stories and media that a woman will still love them unconditionally and throw themselves at them if they’re fat, old, balding, or an asshole, while women are told that if they’re pushy, fat, old or wearing out of style clothes that they aren’t even worth mentioning.
*While I’m bisexual, but I’m not a lesbian so I can’t speak for what a lesbian finds attractive anymore than I can say what a gay man might find attractive. I’m talking about the female gaze toward men in general. We each have our individual tastes tho.
Okay that’s all very true and yes the state of society is absolutely that men are given models to aspire to while women are given models to be attractive for men.
But that doesn’t mean men don’t feel uncomfortable in their bodies when they just physically do not look like these men that society says they’re meant to “aspire to”.
I’m sorry but unattractive men having pretty wives in sitcoms do not make men look at themselves in the mirror and say “well I hate this this and this but luckily I don’t have to look good for a woman to love me”. You just think “I hate this this and this”. Ever since I was a kid I always thought the trope of “fat guy with beautiful wife” on TV was meant to be funny and unrealistic in itself and just everyone used it because it was a cliché.
I utterly agree that the balance of society and representation in general is absolutely in men’s favour but there was no reason to hijack the point of this post to say that. You’ve basically done the same thing as telling a sad person “your feelings are very valid and you have my sympathy… but just remember people have it worse than you!” as if that’s meant to make them feel better.
(Luckily I don’t have body confidence issues at all anymore because I have a wife who tells me I’m pretty every day and I value her opinion over the people who make men’s cologne adverts, so I casted my mind back to how I felt in my teenage years to write this).
The Hunger Games Is Making Hundreds Of Millions Of Dollars So Can We Stop Pretending That Female-Led Action Movies Don’t Make Money And Make A Goddamn Wonder Woman Movie Yet: A Book By Me
The big difference is probably that “The Hunger Games” doesn’t have “Woman” in the title.
I know it’s still completely fucking ridiculous, just saying.
I almost forgot…..Nevada State Senator Kelvin Atkinson comes out as a black gay man today
I love those words.
What I also appreciate is that he had to tell somebody else about themselves.
This is really interesting though surely a massive flaw in the research is the fact that most men (I’d hope anyway, or at least a respectable percentage) would react very differently to images of women and ACTUAL women, especially intentionally sexual images of women. Hell, even if the point is “men shouldn’t automatically assume a woman is an object if they are dressed provocatively”, there’s still a major difference between a sexy image of a woman and a real woman who is dressed sexy (I mean, with nerdy shy people like me, the reaction to the former is “oooh 8D” and the reaction to the latter is “aaaa D8”).
But yeah sad fact is I’m sure a lot of men who are attracted to women WOULD react the same to an image to a real woman but… Yeah I’m just curious what percentage would react in a “this is a human being” way.
But yeah for sexualised IMAGES of women I kinda don’t see anything wrong with objectification if they are intended to be objectified as entertainment. Like, as in “would a bisexual man react in this same “this is an object for me to enjoy” way for both male AND female porn, because that would presumbly exemplify a lack of sexism - because porn is an exception where you can just enjoy sensation without worrying about social respect.
The problem, in such a case, would be with men who mentally cannot seperate fantasy from reality and treat women like this in all contexts, even if only on a subconcious level.
Saw the video floating around so I gif’d it for anyone who doesn’t wanna actually watch it haha.
I love how the whole “babies from bone marrow” thing is making people go “this makes men unnecessary” and men are getting so upset
it’s really fucking annoying to be deemed unnecessary and reduced to something like whether or not you can procreate
THIS EXACTLY THIS.
I want to hand this out like a fucking flier
THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR
ITS THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN. ALREADY THE HALLOWEEN TAG IS FILLING UP WITH BORING AND INSULTING SLUT SHAMING STUFF. CELEBRATE ANY WAY YOU WANT TO.